One of the greatest joys of ministry is the people God places in your life. Over the years, those you serve alongside often become more than fellow church members and become family. That is why one of the deepest pains in ministry is not criticism from strangers but watching people you love walk away from the Church.
Recently, our family experienced this kind of heartbreak.
A family we had served alongside for years made the difficult decision to leave our church after serious, unrepentant sin came to light. Like many deep sins, it came as a shock to us given the family’s consistent involvement every Sunday. We had shared countless ministry moments together, our children were close friends, we had opened our home to one another, and we believed we were pursuing the same mission to faithfully serve Christ and His Church.
Initially, we were hopeful that our friends would seek restoration, but we soon realized that no amount of shared history could erase the consequences of sin. Instead of walking the difficult road of repentance and restoration, they chose to leave, hoping another church would be more accepting of their circumstances.
If you’ve been a pastor’s wife for any length of time, you probably know this kind of grief. There is so much to unpack here – loss, anger, grief, frustration, betrayal – just to name a few. This blog post is only the beginning of coming to terms with a heartbreaking situation.
I want to acknowledge the loss and grief we feel when our friends walk away from the church – regardless of the circumstances.
If you find yourself in season of ministry filled with loss and grief, I want to encourage you with the beautiful promise offered in Psalm 34:18:
“The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.”
My dear Sister in Christ, if you are carrying the weight of someone walking away, know that God sees every tear you have cried. He knows the disappointment. He knows the loneliness. He knows the questions you have wrestled with in the quiet. Most of all, He has not left you.
What a comfort to know that while people may leave, our Holy God never does. He remains close to those whose hearts are bruised by the very ministry He has called them to serve.
Our story is still unfolding and we are unsure of what will come of our dear friends that left. For now, we continue to pray for healing, restoration and repentance. Only Christ can soften the heart of wayward sheep and bring them back into the flock.
In the meantime, know that your grief is real and your hope is still secure in Christ.
Continue loving people.
Continue serving faithfully.
Continue trusting that God is working in the hearts of others, even when you cannot see it.
Many Blessings,
Rose